Quarrel between siblings is something completely normal and occurs in almost all families. It’s usually the little things that give cause for concern and ultimately lead to tears and frustration. It is not uncommon for the parents to be the hardest hit by such arguments. They worry a lot about possibly having made mistakes in their upbringing or about treating the offspring unequally. Mom and Dad are thinking back and forth about how to argument between siblings could mediate and rack their brains about taking countermeasures.
Quarrels between siblings have a cause
If your children are very small and have not yet exceeded the age of three or four, the reason for disputes is often over possession of an object. The smaller one simply wants the toy of the larger one – in the absence of suitable alternative actions, one conquers the coveted piece by simply taking it away. Sometimes physical violence can also be used.
If the offspring is a little older, arguments between siblings are usually an expression of a fight for attention. Children want their parents’ eyes and approval. Recognition and attention play an important role in this. With screaming, crying and the like, the limits are constantly being tested and you can see how far you can go with mum and dad.
How to deal with sibling disputes
- As soon as violence comes into play, it is up to you as a parent to intervene. Rebuke the siblings and explain that disagreements can also be resolved in a friendly manner, without scratching, biting, or hitting.
- If it is a completely normal and inconspicuous argument between siblings, the children should be given the opportunity to resolve the matter themselves. On the one hand, children need to learn to defend their point of view, on the other hand, it is also important to recognize that sometimes you lose. So that the children can get used to dealing with conflicts confidently and well, mum and dad have to stay in the background and give the little ones the opportunity to try out strategies for action.
- Fulfill your role model function. There is little point in teaching children to behave more harmoniously if you do not yourself comply with the conditions of fairness and mutual respect.
- Quarrels between siblings should be discussed afterwards. Reach out to the children and ask about the occasion. A soulful conversation smoothes the waves.
Photo Credit: Phovoir, wavebreakmedia /Shutterstock.com