Bullying can take on serious proportions

School has long been about more than just learning – children are increasingly being confronted with difficult psychological conditions. As a parent, bullying attacks should not be taken lightly.

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Spit on, pull chairs from under your butt, stuff school bags in the garbage, in the worst case brutal fists, kicks or money is extorted. Embarrassing photos or malicious cell phone videos appear on the Internet. Bullying in schools – also known as “bullying” – has long been part of everyday school life. The aim of the bullies: to exclude, humiliate, tyrannize. Usually only cases involving brute force are publicly known.

Bullying hurts the soul

Mostly unnoticed are humiliations that take place in secret: verbal violence or exclusion (I’m not talking to you). What is perfidious about it: the perpetrators are becoming more and more courageous, and those who are being bullied are becoming more and more ashamed. Escape the terror on your own? Fearing that they are themselves a target for attack, many students band together on the side of the bully or remain silent. Signal: bullies, you have free rein!

I hate the school

Parents don’t always know what’s going on between kids. Troubled children and young people tend to withdraw, with the oppressive feeling in their souls: things are going downhill now. And it’s my fault.

Resist the beginnings

Perpetrators must feel resistance: up to here. Not further! The sooner the better. That is why teachers have to show ego strength and civil courage. Make it clear: I’m present, support those who need protection, don’t allow what shouldn’t be allowed. Perpetrators usually quickly sensed that they had no chance here.

Bullying lurks everywhere

One against all? Many against one? People of all nationalities and levels of education are bullied. Recent bullying research is less interested in the person than in the situation. What does a young person do to become a victim. And above all – what not?

Adolescents must learn to defend themselves. Above all, body language decides how kids are received by others. Standing up straight and legs apart, looking angry, rolling your eyes signals: Not with me! The bully learns the unexpected, takes a step back. Sometimes a small – rehearsed – sentence is enough, a self-confident answer to a teasing.

7 tips from bullying expert Rosa Stieger

  • relationship of trust: if this is present, the youth opens up. Discuss fears, concerns, insecurities, or anger. Prerequisite for parents to intervene helpfully.
  • Civil courage and morality in everyday life: Show your child that you intervene when people around you are being treated unfairly in your presence.
  • Strengthen your child: It needs to realize that not all people are good. Must have the courage to get help or say no.
  • Parents as protective authority: Children need to be sure that they will be helped when they are in trouble or need. Help also means intervening if your child shows wrong or even harmful behavior.
  • respect boundaries: Appreciative interaction with others is always the result of (existing) lived and development-promoting rules in the family. Strong children have a large repertoire of prosocial behaviors in the group.
  • Together we are strong: Children also need friends at school so that integration in the class is successful. As a parent, support these relationships to grow and flourish.
  • Fight back: In the course of its development, your child should learn to defend itself appropriately and to draw clear boundaries in the event of unjustified demands or attacks.

Who will help in an emergency?

The buoy, www.die-boje.at

Social info City of Vienna, www.wien.gv.at (under People & Society)

Telephone counseling, emergency call 142 (without area code, free of charge, around the clock), www.telefonseelsorge.at

White Feather, www.together-against-violence.at

Council on Wire (147), rataufdraht.orf.at

Text: Beate Giacovelli

Photo Credit: Rido/Shutterstock.com

04/19_

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